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July 26, 2003

Posted by Michael at 10:55 PM | Comments (2) | Entry Link
OUR RATING: (Worst) 1 out of 5 score.
Johnny English

Well, this film has at least one thing going for it. It just broke new ground! Announcing the very first review to attain the coveted 1 out of 5 rating. This movie was flat out horrible. Now, to be fair, there were a few amusing scenes --
Mr. Bean
(the amazon link leads to some of his hilarious work!) is a funny man, to be sure. The forced injection of a few doses of humor into this mortally wounded movie was just not enough to save it from being a complete waste of time to watch.

Entirely skipping this movie is advised, unless you are extremely bored or possibly intoxicated. Highly intoxicated. The worst part about seeing this film? In the same theater, just a few screens away, a special ALTERNATE version of 28 Days Later was playing with an entirely different ending. To think I forgot all about the alternate release tonight and end up blowing good money on this Johnny Trash garbage -- it hurts.

July 20, 2003

Posted by Michael at 06:12 PM | Comments (0) | Entry Link
OUR RATING: (Worst) 1 out of 5 score.
Gay Crocodile Dundee DOES Los Angeles

Crocodile Dundee in LA? They might as well called it Cock Dundee Does Los Angeles. I caught this on digital cable one morning. Allow me to explain how extremely bored I was to have to sit through this movie. EXTREMELY BORED.

It makes me somewhat sad to see how they have turned Crocodile Dundee into an almost queer-like flop like this. Even the box cover looks like it was designed by the crew from Queer Eye for the Straight Guy or what have you.

July 13, 2003

Posted by Michael at 06:29 PM | Comments (0) | Entry Link
OUR RATING: (Worst) 1 out of 5 score.
In The Army Now

Pauly Shore is pathetic. Putting him into a movie that is supposedly aimed at being humorous and patriotic should be considered against the law. They did it. And it achieved an entire new level of suck factor.

May you never find yourself bored enough to watch this film just to say you've seen it. That's the trap I fell into one boring Sunday morning. You have been warned. It is a war out there, as O-dagg surely knows.

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